2002-06-15 | 5:55 p.m.
The beauty of human nature lies in its complexity.

The servers were down earlier this morning. Daddy and Shomi Uncle were watching the Germany-Paraguay match, Mama was in her own little world, so I was bored as hell. I went to Dida's house for some time,and Dida forced me to eat lunch there. I checked my mail and logged on to MSN on Bo's computer and Derek came online about 2 minutes after I did. He apologised for what happened the other day, and I said it was okay. I couldn't get myself to talk though. I logged off MSN. I'm so retarded sometimes. I haven't talked to him in over 2 weeks now. And somehow,I feel like this might be the best thing.

He might have a certain opinion of Daddy which is my doing, but that really isn't the point at all. I just wish he would've supported me if only for one day. That one day of pure, unadulterated happiness. After all, my state of delusion wasn't going to last very long. Mama wants to leave Daddy. It seems he keeps promising to take her with him to Dubai and cancels at the last minute. She's had barely any money for the last 2 months, and yet, he could afford to take me with him. That makes next to no sense. I saw his life style, and I never feel like he's actually a married man. I know he slept with that waitress at Century Village. It could not have been more obvious. My judgements of him are not moralistic at all though. It's just that Mama's had more than her fair share of misery. I find it hard not to laugh bitterly when she says she's going to leave him. If she hasn't in 26 years, she never will. I guess Derek gets the last laugh.

England-3 ; Denmark - 0....Woo hoo!

I want to get my nose pierced.

deja vu? | jamais vu?