2002-06-14 | 3:21 p.m.
unaffected by the grime and grease

I desperately need something to read. I'm back to reading Catcher in the Rye, for the 9th time.I really need to do something that makes me proud of myself. I need to create , make something with my own hands (or head). I've been thinking about asking school if we can start a radio station. I'm sure Dr.Seago would approve. But from what I hear,the school is in deep financial shit. So I really doubt they can afford that at this point of time. Dammit,that would be so cool though. Scripting shows and compiling music and speaking on air. The more I think about it, the more I wish it was possible. I mean, our school Communications department should fund it, considering radio broadcasting is one of the classes all Comm. majors are required to take. I should ask Matthew to ask Prof. Tomic...hmmm...

I'm listening to In the aeroplane over the sea. The little boy (Vedant) is going to come here at 6 today. Turns out he didn't turn up the other day because he fell asleep after his swimming class.Aaaw..how cute is that? He seems to be doing a lot of things for a four year old.

We're celebrating Daddy's birthday today. I can't believe he's turning 51. That's too fucking old. I don't want my parents to age. I know that sounds ridiculous, but I never thought my parents would be old. They were always going to be in their late 30s. I can't bear to think of them as gray haired and wrinkled and dependent. I always took a strange pride in my parents' good looks, especially Mama's. And now I'm afraid that's going to be decimated by age. I wish I could verbalise stuff without sounding like a shallow idiot.

The world that you need is wrapped in gold silver sleeves

Left beneath Christmas trees in the snow

And I will take you and leave you alone

Watching spirals of white softly flow

Over your eyelids and all you did

Will wait until the point when you let go.

deja vu? | jamais vu?